Beauty in a wasteland

People say that nothing grows in a wasteland
They say its dry, very dry
Just like the dry bones we read about in the bible
But I took time to look at what we call a wasteland
And all is see is potentials for greatness
When I looked I saw beauty and calm
A quiet peace that beats the continuous rush
That is always evident in the fertile land

People say that nothing grows in a wasteland
But with careful examination
You would notice that not only do things grow
They develop a solid root system that goes deep
A root that can't easily be removed
One that becomes a legacy for generations to come
They also develop strong protective coverings
That keeps them from external element that might harm them

People find it hard to see beauty in a wasteland
But it is in this same waste land
That a mighty army shall rise up from
It is this same land that we now find our selves in
A land where roots are burrowing into the soil
On this wasteland when it rains, it pours
Giving life source of water that would never run dry
One that the endless root can drink from for generations to come

This is the beauty you find in a wasteland
Hidden beauty that becomes a treasure
A treasure for generations yet to be born
A treasure that when we begin to mine it
It will never run dry
A treasure that exhibits the goodness of its maker
What do you see in this wasteland
That I leave to you!

AN ENCOUNTER WITH DISABILITY AND A CELEBRATION OF LIFE

This note came to life as a result of a meeting with a wonderful person, this meeting brought back a time in my life about 2 decades ago. Therefore today I remember how wonderful ability is and how great God’s mercies are in our lives. Today I celebrate life; I celebrate ability (physical, mental, emotional, social, and financial) ability in all areas of life.

At the start of the 1990s I was still in secondary school and I had to repeat a year all over again, my parents could not understand why but they held on. Things began to unravel when I did not pick up academically, in fact they thought I was pregnant since I began to sleep a lot and always got tired. This was because I had never been seriously sick so the idea that I was sick did not even come to mind. Then I could not even go to school, medical test showed I had typhoid fever a serious level of it and the illness took up almost half of a year. I and my 3 younger sisters all got infected but mine was the worst, why? We would never know.

Weeks into the illness I became temporarily paralyzed and retarded (or was it autistic?). My mother had to back me, imagine backing a teenager?! She would clean up after me and sponge bath me. It was so terrible (as I was told) I began to say things that were not reality and I lost complete touch of what was real. I could not even feed myself and this went on for months.

I WAS COMPLETELY DISABLED IN ALL WAYS IMAGINABLE TO MAN!!

Why this note? Today as I remember the pain that my family went through praying that I get better and believing that God in heaven will make this happen, I relate with every parent, child, sibling and spouse who is going through what my parents went through for 6 months. A lot of them have dealt with and continue to deal with pain for years without any light at the end of the tunnel and for some there is no way out.

I was not there, so I can’t completely tell the story neither can I share the pain that my family went through because at the time I could not really understand. When I got out of the disability my family was overjoyed and that joy could not enable them share the real pain and agony that they went through so I can’t give you a complete picture.

But this is what I want you to take out of this, it could have been anyone (don’t say God forbid please) because it really could have been anyone. What happened had happened to some (even people I used to know) who never survived and some others are yet to recover from the effect of such sickness. What is it that you are doing to help the person with disability around you? This people I speak of are not the beggars on the street but persons who out of no wish of their own find themselves in this situation and can’t seem to get out of it. Share their pain and help make their lives better. Help create an environment where the persons with disability around you feels like a part of the world you live in, help ensure that they are not second class citizens.

No one knows tomorrow, my parents did not and they had a taste (for 6 months) of how life would be living with a child as who was almost a vegetable. Life is meant for us all, give a helping hand.

This year would mark 19 years that I got over my temporary disability and today God sent someone to remind me of his grace and goodness. Today I am reminded that I am not better than the man without sight or hearing. I am not better that the autistic or the bed ridden, I am not special BUT I have just been given the grace.

I recount my encounter with disability and I celebrate life this day, may God help us all!!

THESE I grew up knowing!!

I grew up knowing that education was the greatest gift a Parent could give to a child and that the best first step for any child would be to value education and make the best of it. I realised that education was not only what you learnt in school, it comprises of a lot of things and most of this were things that you took time to learn yourself. I grew up on books with which i was able to travel to places learn about people and values and carve a place for me. A place where the value of learning and absorbing has become a part of me.

I grew up knowing that relationships are not for children and sex is not something to be taken lightly. I learnt from my parents that for sex to be meaningful love and understanding must come first. I learnt early that what is meant for an adult must not be taken lightly by a child. That a child should not give birth to another child. While a child be a child and when the time comes to have what the adult has, then it will get to your turn.

I grew up with the knowledge that maturity has nothing to do with age and that you can be old and not matured while you can be young and be matured. I realised that our maturity is as a result of our values and the knowledge that we have acquired through mistakes and failures with time.

Over time i realised that no one can love you if you don't love yourself and what ever value you intend to share with other you must first have an understanding of it. I learnt that values are like the bamboo tree; deep rooted and almost impossible to uproot. So I learnt early that we must let people see the "me" you are inside.

I learnt that the success you are today comes from the efforts u made yesterday, and the failures you took time to learn from. That success is not automatic and so it must be worked for and achieved over time.

My mother always made us understand that God is not a magician, he cannot give you something out of nothing. That no matter how hard you pray, if its not backed with faith and works then u become like an empty sounding cymbal. Therefore I learnt to work and live by faith.

I realized that the harder I try to get something outside of God the further away from me it was. This made me conclude that my life is not dependent on wants but on needs and those on what is actually necessary. I learnt and am still learning that in everything I have to put god first and keep him there.

Above all, I learnt that love is the only adhesive that will hold people and nations together. But first the love must start in US; personal and familial love for the next person. This love will create a ripple effect that would change lives.

The me I see!!

On a faithful day some decades ago there was a lot of rejoicing and happiness when a new baby girl was born into the world. Little did the world know that that little girl child would go through pains and so much trials and still be single.

Growing up was fun, because even if I was not born with a golden spoon in my mouth at least I had the proverbial silver spoon to hold on to. Things were good! In a time when Nigeria was growing my parents were actually among one of the very comfortable ones.
Life for the little Girl I was back then, was laced with comfort and joy and even though I saw people with not so much as we had, it never occurred to me that we could end up in penury or that my dad's numerous companies could all go bankrupt. But then what did a little girl know? My early years in school were the best and that was because I did not only learn, I had the best teacher ever, MY DAD!
Anyway, thing started unraveling in my secondary school days. Life was beginning to get hard and I began to have an understanding of what going to bed without food meant, not having the money to buy that which you wanted when you wanted it was a major issue. The fact that we end up blaming life for our situations also became something I had to learn and then another thing I had to unlearn as the times went by. I grew up knowing that life was not really as we had lived it while growing up but that sometimes "things just go wrong" Why? I don't know but really I have no intention of pushing blame.
Later in my early 20s I began to understand that we alone can carve our own destinies, not our parents, not our situation and most importantly not our government. I had spent 5 years at home waiting to gain admission into the university, and then suddenly it dawned on me that if I continued to sit at home I might never go to university. So I determined in myself in 1997 that once i sat for the exam and I made the average score I was going to get admission and you know what? I DID! It was not as difficult as I had thought neither was it as easy as we all think it was. But I was able to get admission into 2 universities the same year.
What was left was where was the money going to come from? I was stumped but then I said to myself, you are in and nothing would stop you from graduating. Then and there I decided I would make good use of what I had. I started making hair for friends since I was good at that. Then I started home coaching later on when friends would make hair and not pay. I did a lot of jobs in the university but I also enjoyed my time there as well. I remember the days of been ever present at the student union arcade, the joy of been part of the activism (at least to a level) and the enjoyment of making good grades in spite of work and play. I was not at my best but I did my best, both at work and at school.
But then the learning was not over. I had to learn that the universities in Nigeria never prepare you for the outside world and I learnt the hard way. With what I had, I found it hard to get a job coupled with the fact that I was already nearing my 3.0 years and I did not serve with my mates. It was so bad at one time that I wondered if I was going to have to go get married first before getting a job. But then I realise that I don't have a job because I don't have any skills to offer any employer. So I started to build and build and here I am now I don't just have the skills but I am very proud of where I am and give thanks to my creator for his grace and love.
I grew up as a snob that selected friends and found it hard to relate with anyone below my level, but now I can relate with anyone whatever and where ever. It’s a great thing to know that all it took for me was that decision to be the creator of my own destiny. To take my destiny (the one that God gave me) in my own hands and make of it what I dream of in the dead of the night.
I am not there yet but at least now I know that I will get there. When? I can't tell you for sure, but when I do get there I will let you know.

WHAT IS IT ABOUT BEING BIG?

What is it about Africa and our culture that is so unattractive to us? Why must we totally discard our tradition because of some alien culture craze?

What is it about big bodied African that has suddenly gone out of fashion? Why have six packs and bony women become fashionable. Back in the days, the full bodied African woman was a Queen? When women chasing was concerned I even learn t that in certain parts of Nigeria, being skinny was so unhealthy and ungodly that women were sent to fattening rooms before they were married out so that the new husbands will know that the bride is from a family that took care of her needs.
Where have all the full bodied "orobo" women gone, why has it suddenly become fashionable to spend the whole day in a gym suffering and sweating blood all in the name of being skinny and having the European slim look?
I remember the movie “PHAT GIRLS” when the African doctor, told Monique that in Africa, big women are in serious demand.
In those days, men wanted to hug a woman and know that they had something to hold not all the oyinbo looking black skeletons that our women have now become today.
For goodness sake, what is wrong with the BIG BODIED?
I believe this is another way of “oyinbo recolonization” and brain washing .
All the best adverts on T.v have slim girls, every product is advertised by slim women and suddenly “thin is beautiful and fat is UGLY. The same way white is good and everything black is supposed to be bad……., remember blackmail, black-book, black-day,black sheep of the family, and in fact the devil is black, HABA!!
At a point, our women were so taken in by this white supremacist theories that they all wanted to be white, so they bleached and even some shameless men joined them in this ungodly act.
Then came the age of our local hairdos, not being good enough. I am talking about "shuku", "patew"o,all back and base, "binta" my daughter, "aladimole", "shuku ologede", and the likes that the queen of Sheba had on when Solomon saw her and he went weak at the knees an had to marry this African beauty.
Our women then started frying their hair in the name of Jerry curls, under the drier and reducing their brain power because of the perming plus washing and setting. Now the craze has gone further it is human hair.
I am sure that soon our women will have "oyinbo" women chasing them in their sleep asking for their hair to be returned not to talk of horses. HABA.
What is it about Africa and our culture that is so unattractive to us? Why must we totally discard our tradition because of some alien culture craze?
The way God created Africans , we are meant to be big,yours truly has tried everything to loose weight but it just keeps popping back, that means my DNA must have been configured by the master architect God; to be like that.
White people because of their diet, location and configuration are not meant to be fat. There is a difference between being obese and fat, obesity is carelessness white fat is natural. There is also a point of being slim that is carelessness, it is called anorexia, sisters eat.
If that guy is gonna love you, he is gonna love you. It has nothing to do with your size, it has more to do with the brain and character. I think in the spirit of natural re-branding, Dora Akinyuli must stand firm and show us the true picture of Nigeria woman. Is she full bodied or anorexic "lepa". God is not wicked enough to give you fat and expect you to spend all your time and money loosing it.
Do not get me wrong, stay in shape but do not kill yourself over the taunts of people who tell you, you are fat. You are not, you are just the way the Nigerian woman or man was created to be.
I know I am going to get a lot of flack over this but the truth of it is, I know somebody out there is going through the “you should loose some weights taunts” , next time a "lepa" disturbs you with that, tell him or her get some weight….get a life.
though I am not guilty of being attracted to "orobos", I know there are men out there who would die for them………

by Adebayo Bishop Ademola


Lepa means Skinny
Orobo means fat and shapely

What has the Bible got to do with it?!

I know funny topic! this days I am constantly asked by friends and not so friendly friends "what has the bible got to do with it?" I even get this question from my "Christian" friends some of whom are born again. But what actually brought up this post was a conversation I was having yesterday with someone (name withheld) who felt that I was tooooooooo religious because I brought the Bible and God into a business question.

Our discussion was on "how to actually be a better you" well something like that anyway. I refereed to the book of genesis, the story of creation and man. I was trying to point out how unique man was amongst all of God's creation and the fact that man ought to be able to have complete control of himself and his environment because God has given him that power.

Anyway that is another topic for another day. This topic is actually to just let us know what the bible has got to do with it! IT been every aspect of our lives! I have come to realize that whatever you are passing through in life someone in the bible is a good case study. Although u also have such case study in real life but the good thing about the bible is that it gives u step by step solutions to the problems. Basically it shows you how to apply this solutions too and how to pray as well. I like the stories of Prophets Elisha, Ezekiel and Nehemiah.

In 2Kings 4 we read about the widow who was taught how to manage debts, once this method is understood and applied it goes a long way in helping u be a good manager and entrepreneur. It also helps you have an understanding of the fact that you have something with you that is useful to the general public and so can be converted to an income generating business/idea.

The book of Esther gives you a step by step breakdown of how best to beat the enemy at his doorstep. Military tactics.It also shows that for everything you have to put God first.

This is what the Bible has Got to do with it:

1

Its a good case study for all occurrences

2

Its a map to a destination

3

With the bible You cant go wrong

4

It reminds you constantly to put God first

5

It helps you understand that you are not alone and you are not the first

So next time you are with someone and he refers to the Bible or God, don't get your dander up! That is the best place to get answers.

On This Land

On this land, I was Born.
Born to be Great.
Greatness, I shall attain.

On this land, I have Grown.
Grown with Pride.
Prideful joy.

On this land, I was Trained.
Trained to Be good.
Be good to all men.

On this land, my eyes opened.
opening to the greed.
The greed and selfishness of men.

On this land, I shall struggle.
Struggle for what is mine.
And mine it shall be.

On this land, I shall fight.
Fight for my freedom.
The freedom to live.

On this land, I shall battle.
Battle for the freedom.
The freedom of others.

On this land, I shall restore.
Restore our pride.
The pride that was in tatters.

On this land, I shall live.
Live and let live.
Live peacefully with others.

On this land, I shall multiply.
Multiply into dynasties.
Dynasties of heroes.

On this land, I shall harvest.
Harvest my fruits.
The fruits of my labour.

On this land, I shall die.
die with pride.
The pride of the land.

On this land, I shall live.
Live in the memories of men.
Men who will uphold the pride of the land.

©Idris Dosunmu 2010